OK, so onto my dream, which seems pretty ridiculous now. In it, Rooney denied publicly that he’s been suffering from an ankle injury and went on to reveal that he wasn’t interested in signing a new contract at United. Then the press went all crazy, saying he’s told everyone that his time at the club is done because they can’t guarantees about the future because of the debt the Glazer family has piled onto the club. Around that same time, Sir Alex Ferguson did some interviews with more candor than I’ve ever seen from him saying Rooney was gone. Then Rooney had a press conference to explain he was gone. Then Robbie Fowler said tongue-in-cheek that Rooney wanted to go play for Perth Glory. Then I wrote a tongue-in-cheek post encouraging Major League Soccer to table a bid and amp up the hype machine. After a dream in which a tooth fell out and another one where my car stuttered and couldn’t start and eventually caught on fire, I woke up.

I find that very hard to believe that an England international just entering his prime would want to jump to the A-League. I’m 99 percent sure Fowler was blowing smoke or saying ridiculous things just to see what he could get the media to print. Maybe tomorrow he’ll say he was out for a walk and was abducted by aliens, which I would actually find less ridiculous than his current claim.

BUT, the one percent of me that thinks this is so outrageous it must be true wonders how long it’ll be before he’s talked up for a move to Major League Soccer. I’d hate to see MLS lose out on a chance to advance its stature by not even tabling a bid. An MLS club should take a shot: United will be letting him go for under his market value since he could buy out his contract this summer, and $20-30 million seems a small price to pay to actually sign a foreign superstar who’s still in his prime. I wouldn’t hold my breath on any of this, of course, as I’m 99 percent sure I would pass out, but I do think it’s worth the media attention for at least one or two MLS clubs to start publicly stating interest.

A rendering of the Doha Port Stadium in Qatar, which, if built, could take the cake as one of the most beautiful sports facilities in the world. (Photo: Qatar 2022)

What do you think of Qatar’s chances of landing the World Cup? Before you say, “TOO HOT,” bear in mind that all of the stadiums are designed to be cooled and carbon neutral. I still think the US is the front-runner to host 2022, but I must admit, I’d start saving up now just for a chance to geek out at the stadiums if Qatar can land it.

Anyway, the big sellers on this game are the “Personality+” and the Creation Centre, which uses an online application to make custom teams and players to download into the game. That sounded way easier than pushing sliders around on the system itself.

Personality+ has shown through almost immediately. I played games on both the professional and world class settings, and the different inclinations of players was readily apparent. For one thing, AI players never used to try skill moves; now they do it all the time, often with devastating effect, as I learned when the KC Wizards’ Ryan Smith made my defense look clumsy and porous.

I’m disappointed with the Creation Centre. The options for the players go a long way toward establishing their personalities, which is cool, but the team creator leaves much to be desired. It’s mostly just a system of coloring in simple logo templates. I was hoping the online system would open the door to uploading your own artwork for uniforms.

There’s also a new mode where you can play Be A Pro as a goalkeeper. It sounded fun on paper, but in reality it’s a lot of watching the computer kick the ball around while waiting for something to happen. Perhaps playing as a goalkeeper for a terrible team would make the mode more interesting.

Of course, there’s the usual wealth of FIFA options. I was amazed at how many teams now have a third kit available to users, and for dorky reasons I was in awe of the ability to manipulate the mowing pattern and grass wear on the field, as well as the option to change the shape and tension of the nets.

I’ll have more complete thoughts as I get into the career mode, which this year allows you to build a career as a player before moving into management. I generally lose interest in manager mode around year six, so I’m hoping the elimination of separate Be A Pro and Manager Modes will add some long-term intrigue for me, especially seeing as how I tend to only upgrade every other year.

If you’ve played the game, feel free to add your thoughts below.

My favorite line is this: “The crux of soccer’s debt habit is this: Clubs aren’t nearly as good at generating income as they think they are.” Personally, I can’t help but wonder (in a slightly horrified way) what we’re going to see first: A series a of huge clubs crumbling under the weight of their own debt, or a revolution of club management that runs teams under the harsh light of reality instead of the floodlit illusion of grandeur.

What do you think? Do you support a club that’s financially unstable? Which would you rather have: the danger of bankruptcy or the stability of knowing there’s a future?

Is Heath Pearce the Jekyll to the Nefarious Mr. Ben's Hyde?

Heath Pearce would seem to be a little busy, what with being a starting defender for FC Dallas and all, but he certainly seems to match our artists’ representations of what the Nefarious Mr. Ben might look like. Given that the Nefarious Mr. Ben often has others do his wicked deeds for him, it’s not inconceivable that Pearce is behind all this.

Or he could just be rocking an awkward mustache, Joey Barton style! Actually, had he not shaved the mustache, Joey Barton was probably a more likely suspect to be the Nefarious Mr. Ben, but it just seems too obvious.

3:22 p.m. edit: It has come to my attention that Gary Neville and Franck Ribery also fit the description of the Nefarious Mr. Ben. With so many mustachioed footballers, it’s likely going to take a great deal more digging to find the whereabouts and identity of the scheming agent, the Nefarious Mr. Ben.

I should also note that this is not an indictment of all mustaches. Not all mustaches are evil.

Put yourself in the ref’s shoes: Would you have shown Henry a second yellow card for the incident?

You can also read MLSSoccer.com editors’ comments about the incident here: http://www.mlssoccer.com/news/article/mixed-messages-debating-henry-hartman-incident

What’s causing the tilt? Does this strengthen the argument that MLS should go to a single-table format?